The Art of Flirting: Secrets to Successfully Communicating with Guys

Flirting with an attractive guy can feel like a daunting task, but in reality, it's much simpler than you might think! All you need is confidence, a positive attitude, and a few subtle hints of interest. By mastering the following steps, you'll be able to flirt and charm the one who catches your eye!

Flirt While Near Him

Step 1. Establish Eye Contact.

First, make eye contact. This is the foundation of flirting that can be applied in any situation when the guy is within your line of sight. You don’t have to stare into his soul, but your gaze should convey your interest.

• If the guy meets your gaze, that's a good sign—he might like you. Even if he looks away, he might just be shy.
• Try to focus on him until he catches your eye. Maintain eye contact for a few seconds, then smile and look away.
• If you’re feeling bold when your eyes meet, don’t hesitate to wink!

Step 2. Smile.

Smile! Studies show that a smile makes you more attractive, so use this to your advantage and don’t be afraid to show off your dazzling smile!

• A smile makes you appear friendlier and more approachable. It can encourage the guy to come over and start a conversation.
• Plus, smiling boosts your confidence and happiness—two key elements of successful flirting.

Step 3. Use Body Language.

Don’t forget about body language! You can convey a lot without saying a word. Smiling and eye contact are just part of it; there are other useful techniques:

• Avoid crossing your arms. This creates an impression of being closed off and unapproachable, which can scare the guy away. Many do this unconsciously when nervous, so be mindful.
• Toss your hair. This feminine gesture draws attention to your locks and is a well-known flirty action. Play with your hair in front of him, and he’ll get the hint that you’re flirting.
• Play with your jewelry. This draws attention to your neckline, which generally attracts guys.

Step 4. Create Opportunities to Meet.

Create opportunities for frequent encounters. To flirt, you need to be around the object of your interest as much as possible. Make an effort to cross paths with the guy, but don’t be intrusive.

• Walk by his desk when you leave, or take your pet for a walk in the same park where he plays football.
• But don’t overdo it, or you’ll come across as a stalker.

Step 5. Take Care of Your Appearance.

Choose outfits that make you look your best. Confidence comes from looking good when the guy is around. You don’t need to wear mini skirts or high heels; just be well-groomed and tidy. If you look attractive, it will help you feel confident while flirting!

• Keep your hair, teeth, and nails clean, and groom any excess hair. This will help you feel beautiful and confident.
• Wear clean, unwrinkled clothes that are comfortable. A great choice is fitted jeans.
• Experiment with hairstyles and makeup to look fresh and unique every day.

Step 6. Take the Initiative.

Don’t be afraid to make the first move. Sure, you can wait for the guy to show interest, but that might take a long time. By taking the initiative, you’ll stand out from other girls, and hopefully, it will all work out well.

Flirt in Person

Step 1. Start a Conversation.

Start chatting. One of the best ways to transition into flirting is to initiate a conversation with the guy. Find topics you have in common, such as school, work, or recent events.

• Ask questions. This shows that you want to learn more about him, not just about yourself. Ask what he thinks about the latest movie or how his weekend was.
• Avoid yes or no questions to keep the conversation flowing.
• Focus on him. People love talking about themselves, so try to steer the conversation toward him—this could be music, sports, or the future.
• Frequently mention his name. People love hearing their name in conversation, especially from the opposite sex; it creates an intimate atmosphere.

Step 2. Smile and Laugh During the Conversation.

Smile and laugh throughout the conversation. This shows that you’re comfortable with him and enjoying the chat.

• This will make you more attractive and cheerful, just how a guy wants to see you.
• Laughing at his jokes will make him feel witty, which he’ll appreciate. But don’t overdo it to the point of scaring him off.

Step 3. Break the Touch Barrier.

Look for opportunities to touch the guy to clearly show that you’re flirting and open to physical contact. Try the following:

• Lightly touch his forearm during the conversation. This could be while laughing or as a sign of comfort.
• Casually place your hand on his shoulder. This creates a sense of friendship and shows you’re comfortable around him.
• If you're walking, lean into him slightly. If there’s a flirty atmosphere, take his hand and observe his reaction.
• Adjust his collar. Say he’s wrinkled, and as you fix it, touch him. Look into his eyes and say, “Much better!” then step back.

Step 4. Draw Attention to Your Body.

Pay attention to your body. For guys, visual elements are very important, and a little exposed skin always grabs their attention. If you subtly hint at your attractiveness, his heart will race.

• Massage your shoulder. Pretend to be in pain and slightly open your neckline to draw attention.
• Ask him what he thinks of belly button piercings. If the guy stumbles in response, you’ll know you’ve caught his interest.
• Lick your lips to evoke thoughts of kissing. Do this naturally and casually.
• But don’t overdo it! Drawing attention to your body works well when done in moderation. Avoid being too overt, especially in public places.

Step 5. Dance Together.

Dancing is a wonderful way to express attraction in a relaxed setting. It doesn’t matter where you dance—at a party or a club; the main thing is to spend time together.

• Make it clear that you want to dance with him. Take his hands and lead him away from the crowd. If he follows willingly, it means he wants to dance with you.
• Dance playfully but not too provocatively. You’re in a public space, so don’t get too carried away.
• If he’s an unsure dancer, help him loosen up by showing him fun moves. Don’t be afraid to look silly—it’ll make him laugh!
• Try a slow dance. Place your hands on his shoulders and let him wrap his arms around your waist; sway slightly and gaze into each other’s eyes—he’ll melt from your gaze!

Step 6. Give Compliments.

Don’t wait for compliments just for yourself—guys love praise too! Let him know you notice his strengths and appreciate them. This will help him understand that you’re interested in him.

• Be specific. Compliments should be precise and unique. Instead of general phrases, highlight his specific achievements or traits.
• If he’s into sports, compliment him on his success. If he plays an instrument well, tell him you like it. If you’re close, mention the color of his eyes and look into them.
• Give compliments quietly, leaning closer to make them more intimate.
• Look into his eyes and smile to emphasize the sincerity of your words. One simple and genuine compliment is worth more than a dozen insincere ones.

Step 7. Playfully Tease Him.

Playful teasing is a great way to flirt if done right. It creates a sense of closeness and shows that you have a sense of humor. Be ready for some playful teasing in return!

• Tease him about small things. For instance, joke about him having a crush on the teacher or that he loves his dog more than anything.
• If he looks particularly attractive, ask how his interview with a famous host went, or comment on his toned muscles.
• Avoid teasing him about personal topics. Don’t touch on his family, work, or looks until you’re closer.

Step 8. Leave Him Wanting More.

Don’t let the conversation drag on to the point where the guy starts to get bored. Leave when he’s still interested so he looks forward to your next encounter.

• Leave room for future conversations. Say you have to go, but you could meet up tomorrow to create anticipation.
• Lean in as if to kiss, but at the last moment, pull back and whisper, “This was great!”

Flirting Through Texts

Step 1. Send Him a “Accidental” Message.

Text him as if it were an accident. If you’re unsure how to maintain a text conversation, try pretending you’re writing to someone else, like your best friend.

• Write something like, “Haha, right! What are you doing this weekend? :)
• A few minutes later, send another message: “Oops, sent that to the wrong person, sorry! What are you doing this weekend? ;)”
• This way, he’ll think you accidentally started a conversation but are still happy to chat.

Step 2. Don’t Be Boring.

Boring messages are uninteresting. Questions about the weather or what’s happening won’t lead to an engaging conversation. Try to be original and send messages that will make him smile.

• For example, text: “Just saw a teddy bear and thought of you” or “Help me decide: donut or chocolate cake?”

Step 3. Leave Some Questions Unanswered.

Don’t answer all the questions in his messages. This can make you seem too eager.

• Respond to one or two questions and leave the rest unanswered. This will add an air of mystery and keep him waiting for your reply.
• But don’t bombard him with questions to avoid coming off as too pushy. Send short and sweet messages.

Step 4. Flirt.

Once you feel comfortable chatting, start raising the flirtation level by dropping hints that you want more.

• Don’t take too many risks. You don’t have to be too overt, just hint that you want more. For example: “Watching a horror movie, and if you were here, I wouldn’t be so scared!”
• If he responds playfully, keep it going. Reply with a compliment, like: “Can’t forget how good you looked in that shirt!”
• If you want to spice things up, be a little more suggestive. For instance, if you haven’t replied to his texts for a while, text: “Sorry, I was in the shower…” This will ignite his imagination.

Step 5. Don’t Send More Than Two Messages in a Row Without a Reply.

Don’t send more than two messages in a row if you haven’t received a reply. Texting rules suggest that you should receive as many messages as you send.

• Exercise self-control and don’t text when something pops into your mind. Wait for something interesting. If you send two messages and don’t get a reply, stop.
• Don’t be the one texting first too often. Be a little mysterious and wait for the guy to text you. This shows he’s interested.
• Avoid sending messages that only require one-word answers. This can be frustrating and doesn’t allow for further conversation.

Step 6. Send Images.

Send photos. This is a fun way to communicate and ensures that he has a picture of you on his phone.

• Send him a funny photo with friends and add: “Want to join?”
• Send a photo of yourself lounging on the couch with the caption: “Bored. Can you entertain me?”
• Or send a movie poster and simply ask: “Interested?”

Step 7. Suggest Meeting Up.

Texting is a great way to invite the guy, especially if it’s hard to do it in person. Do it casually, for example:

• “Hey! Just watched the trailer for the new Batman movie; I want to see it. Want to go to the movies this weekend?” — or: “I want to try a caramel cappuccino! Want to meet up after school for coffee? :)”
• Even if he declines, don’t worry. Communicating through texts makes everything easier and more laid-back. Just say: “No worries. We’ll catch up another time!” and give him time to think about continuing the conversation.